International Corporation of Lost Structures

London Meeting

To discuss London/UK ICOLS Event for 2003

Vauxhall SW8
March 2nd 2003
5pm - 3 am

UK members present:
Suzanne Treister - Director, ICOLS
Richard Grayson - Night Manager, International Department of Local Aesthetics
Monica Ross - Archivist, Department of Dislocated Memory
Pat Naldi - Research Analyst, Department of Dislocated Memory
John Paul Bichard - Spymaster (with responsibilities for Psychological Operations), ICOLS
Julian Walker - Parallax Observer, Local Unit of Missing Links
Andrew Brighton - Writer, Department of Global Disenchantment

On speakerphone:
Bronia Iwanczak

Simon Poulter
- Systems Analyst, Department of Global Disenchantment
Marek Kohn - Strategic Planner, Department of Revolutionary Nostalgia
Pauline van Mourik Broekman - Counsellor, Department of Global Disenchantment

Whereabouts unknown:
Ranu Mukherjee
- Lab Technician, The Local Unit of Missing Links


MINUTES - Monica Ross

5-6pm - Photos taken of everyone outside in backyard with ICOLS banner

Tea break: all looked through Glasgow ICOLS Event photos, members' flyers, audio cd, Bronia's CheKeanu T shirt, ICOLS name tags, etc.

Director's presentations (ST):

Missives from overseas members to London group:

Idea, conceptual from Janos Sugar, invisible text message on wall; an art historian, described as effete (!) C18th member sent impressive epistle about kangaroos in Duffy, Australia: person who used to be "Just William" sent a linguistic plan for respelling 'RAIN'; LMW from Adelaide asked Night Manager to arrange a London pen pal; apparently according to Night manager, Simon Poulter and someone else are already doing it (at this point half the meeting were under the impression that S. P. was going to prison - clarification from the Director revealed it was Brisbane) (short pause to discuss invitation to participate in the 6th Sharjah International Biennial, from David Goldenberg) - perhaps we need a playful lawyer (oxymoron) to draw up a contract. Monica will send QT apple contract to use as model for such a contract. (include clause about hamsters). Platform suggested (by Carina Diepens) as poss London venue, but not right now, "inter-vent tent or van" suggested instead.

London Event discussion: Anchorage of ICOLS before June in London landscape/like Sydney but different. What to do? event model?? Brainstorming suggested by Andrew Brighton - "Honours" ceremony. IBE Invite pompous person to bestow honours. Also some people should be defrocked - delauded. Surrealists, saints/dead people, especially if performing to camera. = confer and withdraw honour...ceremony = lets do it! Hours and hours = structure " dead peoples" honours, people in audience should/can nominate ..... etc. AKA self-nominating (act would strike back at non-award establishments) Brief discussion while idea is checked for having a previous owner. Is it like a trial? or sinister, self nominate but have to prove worth. Or equivalent of BAFTA fellowship, old farts. Would the Audience invent the honour? or ICOLS? E.g. the categories of conferment? In Latin? (Hungarian?) First shadow structures like at Oxford University (conf and alcohol) PHDs? Nominative structure?? (Melvyn Bragg) something if subject to dishonour clause. Assassination lists and contribution to religious broadcasting.

Night manager suggests self-committee. Director asks for clarification of nomination structure, see Dir link-unsuspecting participants.... outside/inside? band? Cabinet War Rooms, function room hire? (too expensive, need to keep within means) but quite timely/finely discussed. Back to eccentric place - picnic etc. snappy concept, what can we manage in this semi-detached part of our lives? open wine. JPB suggests 6 venues for 30 seconds each, e.g. National Gallery, St Martins in the avoid eviction.

Discussion to more anarchic different kind of "investiture" place (e.g. ......published documents...)

Conceal/reveal ICOLS committee structure (Nobel Prize). How democratic? Director says no me and B have final say, no democracy.

Discussion of people who are going to be politely told to resign..critical decisions have to be made. JPB nominated as Terminator...awaiting orders.

(take a page out in a newspaper) RG suggests getting magazines to publish our awards list. (Adrian's 'The 3' cited, re press activity) ICOLS poetry readings in Herefordshire, someone suggests all ICOLS members are repressed poets. masturbation now discussed. Instant rhyming poem from night manager.

(.........singing?Cuban Lenin). Discussion of effect of opening wine and promising to get bulldozers.

Resolution: Andrew Brighton (AB) will write up "ICOLS Honours Ceremony" proposal as his first "conceptual work" for ICOLS.

JPB suggest each dept comes up with a set of awards.

PN suggests 'prizes' 3D awards. discuss certificates, icols medals, ribbons, ribbons are popular. Directrice provides CCCP examples. discussion collapses into several eulogies into medals, school ties etc. Now we are back to lawyers (Bronia's partner mentioned. re. ICOLS declarations of war, Arts council mentioned, "El Aida" and Global conflict) & muralists (publicly funded) pre-emptive strikes against all that is sacred? War declared on Aida. Night manager suggests renaming all terrorist organisations after operas. we decide we need to start taking out cast members of Aida.

JPB asks: Key Question: Who does ICOLS back? quick move to canonisation policies = Spike Milligan for sainthood (nominated by AB). Obviously we are against Verdi. Also college of Cardinals? Looking like we could do with a theologian. PR person of Global Disenchantment enquires who the boss is? Is this why we have all failed in new capitalism? No bosses in ICOLS - except for Directrices? Prepare to phone Bronia. Will we be waking her up? What will she think about Verdi policy?

7.35pm: Decide to brains storm other ideas for London event, although we are all into going with Andrew's, why not have more while we are at it, we can always do them too. AB announces other idea and is told to write it down.

JW has 'Dictionary" idea. AB's suppressed idea connects to this. Most of us have not done this. We should (i.e. existing library is not being contributed to). "Devils Dictionary" = Flag (rubbish may not be stored here). Dictionary could work as a new web page from Julian? Directrice suggests Julian take another role as 'Lexicographer' in ICOLS HQ? Invites members to send in definitions. Note re. increased complexity, what language? (Members are from all over.) ICOLS book discussed. Books are ok. so more stuff like this please.(Directrice and night manager are actually Australian citizens) Hungary mentioned for printing. Night manager talks of AUS/Hung funding in 1992 and binding, binding advised in Czech republic.

Back to 'manifestations' rather than web site....

Discussion of fictional roles/........-distance, inflection of being invisible, esp in case of spy master (JPB). Anecdote of R+S's friends eating the ICOLS cakes..

Resolution: All future ICOLS cakes should be archived.

...fatal bread and breast milk cheese discussed, also truth drugs, Ben Nicholson and concrete language. Bibliographies, encyclopedias - arcane character of ICOLS.

Resolution: Julian Walker will be Lexicographer.

Each member having more than one job and working for more than one dept - means more conceptual frameworks for new ideas. Pseudonyms are ok when approved by difficult to find "Head of Pseudonyms". Some depts are losing momentum. E.g. dept of displaced revolutions was renamed dept of future projections. No one noticed. Alien scientist joined. Some people just dock in and dock out (Night manager) Spy Master (JPB) asks for time slots. AB announces tiredness due to oxygen poisoning. " secret dept of bl....." Storming of ICECAMS? STORE, JPB & ? concluded more people were killed in the making of the Eisenstein film than took part in the actual storming of the Winter Palace (72). ICOLS doesn't there an enemy within? RG suggests ICOLS storms the fridge. ICOLS a the meeting tonight there is a relationships to institutional art, how spurious is our coming together? New people wanting to send work, is this a worry?) Directrice enlarges.....i.e. they are interested for interesting reasons)

Discussion re ICOLS lack of dept of health and safety.

Is there a dept of Health and Beauty? asks Enid Brighton? ....

Do Australians hate England? Chair enquires about dining? The office of BSM simulator - effect without cause/ cause without effect. Discussion of simulators, gear theory, computer vocals, Winter Palace/ICE CAMS, boredom simulation, feedback, ICOLS terminator, film, parallel historian (father of cake maker - did he eat them?) ICOLS messages in bottles, thrown in gulf stream (read out by night manager, documented for www) -each member contributes a unifying theory (diff structures) from their dept. discussion of animation, newsreel, no flash, what happened to respect? ? had idea that the Directrices write a script "telepathy of the damaged" that is passed along the members like an 'exquisite corpse'. 4 mins film/video is made by each. Like filmic consequences, yes. All perform script from cue, without seeing previous section. Just see last image/frame? even that might be too much. We hope the Hungarians will join in with this, Laszlo has a video camera. The night manager turns into a performance artists, the Chairman (AB?) is horrified.

PN: suggests another poss project, where she works they have details of free time on billboards.

Be great! Is this Muralism? Could put ICOLS logo? Where are they? most exp road in London, Blackwall Tunnel. costs, downtime in printers, problems, 4am, 3D?

Resolution: Pat Naldi to provide more specifics of billboard opportunities.

back to video games, what happens when you run off the virtual boundary? mechanics of eating. discussion of 7 maids/7 brides for 7 brothers. what are we going to tell Bronia? we are in R & D? yes.

Phonecall from Bronia, 9pm:

Can you hear? not yet? photos of everyone on the phone to Bronia (speakerphone, bad volume, cheap phone). Phone is handed around. AB proposes to Bronia.

AB describes honours and sainthoods project (details not determined) Bronia laughs O.K. Directrice Treister elaborates details of "after award". We are at award. An " Afterward" ceremony. Monica is concise to Bronia - the directrices write a script for ICOLS members to perform in sequence, on super 8, each group getting the last frame from the previous group's session.

Monica forgets idea and doesn't describe efficiently so directrice Treister explains project. (Monica is phased by talking to an object ( speakerphone)). Julian explains his idea - Bronia thinks film theorists could write about it. Bronia contributes info about "Order of St. Stanislaw" from her father. ICOLS medals again, 'A gong attracts a gong, it's a network'.)

"This is London". Julian explains his new job as Lexicographer/dictionary..

(Directrice elaborates). i.e. The Translator (holds phone to her head)

also explains re. "headless reps" of depts. Bronia and Suzy are "Bossy Boots". explains also the terminator role (JPB) Oh wow! much appreciated by Bronia. Night manager photographs conversation between Treister and white speakerphone (Bronia). Everyone loves Bronia' s T-shirt (The CheKeanu red one on the coffee table with the ICOLS flyers).

Bronia asks for dot point list of times, action etc. Directrice sneezes. promises report.

Quotes from notes: (throw walnuts and ivory) so we could rename all terrorist organisations after operas - B. approves 100%. Asked if she went to see Aida recently - but it was Parsifal (PLO). Rigoletto Army Faction (E.N.O.).
Good-byes to speakerphone (Bronia)

Follow on: Film idea discussion continued...(exquisite film) 25 seconds, two determining factors 1. you do it from the frame you receive. 2. for as long as you can hold your breath.

much measuring of breath holding takes place. M, P and S manage 13 secs then giggle. Spymaster (JPB) manages one and a half mins, AB (chairman?) manages one min 45 secs, night manager, maybe a minute.

Discussion of swimming underwater, Houdini, discussion becomes diffused.

Resolution: 'Exquisite Film' idea to be discussed further.

Dinner is served.