Meeting report: SYDNEY - April 2005


Sydney Meeting: Clovelly:2031

Meeting begins 19:50/4/05

Present: Mistress of Virtual relations (MR), The Great OM (NH), Rumerologist (MM)

Co- Director aka Voodoo therapist (BI) and Legal Counsel (one who dances well with the

lobster Oracle)



AC: Overseas, JM: Unsure of meeting date, DH: Missing, DM: Relationship counseling, JP: doing layouts for Murdoch,  AC & BC: On holidays, HG: Two prior appointments, JR: caught on the train from Wollongong.




Promotional material

Upcoming A-fair and future venues

New media grant for R & D



General pre-meeting milling around

NH: talks about DNS attack- 400 emails per minute- NH thinks server should have paid for it.


NH + BI: talk about Feral Fox red wine, and the ecology of foxes in the development of a

South Australian Pinot. BI explains that in the absence of their favorite food the rabbit they

eat the lower fruit of the vine, which enhances the top fruit, the grapes perform a laxative

function as well which means the foxes refertilise the soil , a type of concentration at both



MM: Maria talks about attention deficit disorder ­ and how a section of her site gets many

hits because people confuse her work with research in sensorial co-ordination lack.


MR arrives at 7.50.


Meeting starts 19:51


All agreed that the good weather could not last that we had had the last weekend of

summer, Autumn was upon us. (motion passed)


BI: Relates recent activities including investments, Artfairs, Exhibitions and conferences, ie.

the more recent invitation to speak at the Relational Aesthetics conference at IMA


NH: says that there is a hidden agenda with institutional conferences, itıs referred to as

R.I.P (Research Index Points), i.e. money spinning to find money within institutions.

General discussion ensues about how ICOLS can increase itıs money making capacities


NH: We should have a shareholding structure


MM: ICOLS members should become shareholders and have a percentage in the

company-dividends. Do we go public or have private shares?


NH: (explains by way of metaphor) you can invest shares in a ship


MM: (likes the idea and  adds: The ICOLS ship of fools


MM: continues with the example of a movie, Rock Hudson featured in it, he had a product

called VIP, which was essentially an idea, nothing more, but everyone wanted to invest in it.


BI: suggests a more steady investment Sugar on the stockmarket, which is like a type of

heroin, a product that was ubiquitiously consumed. Regular commodities were sound

investment choices.Especially with an ageing population, they eat a lot of sugar. Related to

members recent acquisition of shares in Polish chocolate company Wedel.


All agreed that Futures in sugar was a good option as well.


MM: (muses) The Popeıs death could generate sympathy for Wedel investment. Melinda its like going to darling harbour the sun ski show.


BI: also talks about recent Art acquisitions for The ICOLS Corporate Art collection and her

trip to Miami basel. Whilst acknowledging the cultural cannibalism of the event she did profit from the visit.

All agreed that Artfairs were surprisingly unpleasant.


MR: Adds that its like going to Darling Harbour* for a trade show: The Sun Surf Ski show.


Nigel: How about the futures market in Art. What about investing in Art Students - the

future production of their art so in a sense you buy a percentage of their future worth So,

we say 25% and then collect ten years later.


BI: states that artists have an enflated egos so you have to anticipate a 25% delusional

factor in their estimation of their self worth.


NH And their is a calculus of failure. Maybe 10%. Its gambling.


NH: you donıt have to buy racks and worry about storage.

All agreed that there were advantages regarding storage, and


BI: added that extensive interviews with the student artist to be invested in had to be

conducted - good craft technique was important, and generally pictures of landscapes and

animals gave a greater degree of return. e- bay was a serious option as well for elite

commodities and that the ICOLS photograph by Richard prince would fetch quite well on



NH: How about futures in ICOL artists.


MR talks about buying from GBK as an investment, it was generally agreed that his prices

were too cheap, but better or us.


BI: What about the promo material for ICOLS, (hands old pamphlet to members for viewing and feedback).


MM: Wants to make it more like an Annual report, but we wonıt be paying dividends


NH: (goes back to investing options) Buying wine produced by foxes


MM: Buying pure air from Tasmania and pure water as investments.


BI. How about putting a list of our services, as consultants in a whole range of services, ie.

Nigel is in cosmic vibrations


MM: says she has a friend that channels animals- tells the owner how the animal is feeling.

All agreed that this ws a great service to be offering- animal channeler


MM: Westpac has really cute ads, we could use that as the graphic template


BI: Agreed that bank promotional graphics rocked


Generally agreed that we should research the current look of companies and what they are

sending out.


NH: Starts some talk of subscription membership, and adds the category of frequent flyer website: Frequent hitters


MM: (stray thought) might want to branch out from Rumerology, maybe become a water



BI: adds that she could team up with the water pourer from LA from our futures division

Bi: introduces discussion about New media grant

BI: We need to establish the basis of the project- New media ­ an invention that involves

community relations and develop it to market.


MR:Asks whether we have consulted the granting body.  Hi Taylor, I want a grant, how do



BI: Emphasizes that the grant should be conceptually reflexive and ironic of Australian

funding grant structures.


NH: talks about patenting short marriage contracts- heıs been married twice, looks good for

his age. 


MR: Mistress of virtual relations for networked exchange body fluids married has been twice as well.


NH: so its water, air and body fluids


All said: chanted in unison: ICOLS fertility bank- sperm and ovum,


MR: It would be a nice show.


All said title to be: The Future of ICOLS: Relationships and Reproduction.


MR,NH,MM: We could marry people, and have marriage contracts, we could apply to become internet ministers...


NH: Suggests we become a cult: You only have to have 25 signatures for a cult and therefore we become tax exempt.


BI: says we have the signatures and therefore ICOLS is a cult

All agreed that we are a cult?

All agreed that we have to apply to be a cult, and that we were a cult, we shared the same

belief system, etc.


MM:Who do we apply to?


NH +MR: The Tax department

General discussion about how we should apply to the new media board to become a cult,

the cult of new media as no-one else is looking after it.


BI: we need to get back to establishing the criteria ­ brief for the application


BI: something involving new technology and community orientated (something that also

makes reference to the removal of the CCD board as well.


NH: It has to be more than single genre, it has to be mixed media ie. video and performance


MR:ICOLS dance company, thatıs a bit scary.


MR:Like old phones with wheels, and they all move across the floor in sync.


BI: something that we can all do together. I could argue that different departments

progress various aspects of the design process. i.e. Department of missing links can check for bugs in the software


NH: How about a device to enhance the creativity of schoolchildren.


MR & NH: A device to enhance cross cultural creativity in children


NH:emphasises that it has strong IP.


BI: Its so cynical it fits our standard of realism


MM: childcare and we welcome pregnant woman - we could do something for the unborn

child, now that abortion is illegal


MR: A culture capsule that could be consumed for the child by the mother (MR gestures to

show consumption pathway).


BI: maybe something about termination of life whilst one is in a coma, perhaps?


NH: YOUTH in ASIA. That could be a special category-A Pacific Rim strategy...


MR: (Goes on a tangent) The next ISEA proposal...


MR talks to NH: Can you think of a strategy- Iım at a blank for the next ISEA.


NH: The last one was called ship, the next one is going to be called aircraft...


BI: Lets get back to the grunt. Any last thoughts?


MM: Says why donıt we do anything and call it device


MM & NH: Are we going to collaborate with a Russian scientist from the last century. We

could work with the deceased Piaget via a séance.


MR: Refers to Nori and marias séance experiments -but doesnıt it only contact Marshall



MM: Oh No- donıt worry, any body can be called.


NH: Adds the advantages with dead people is you donıt have to pay for them


MM: We just need to get letters from them agreeing to appear and that they will wave their



MM: how about a collection of dolls


BI: talks about her experience in the UN souvenir shop, there is a comprehensive collection

of dolls from all around the world.


MM & MR: Lets get a a letter of support from Kofi Annan


MR: Lets get a letter of support from the YES men and Randel Packer from the US dept of Art and Technology and Peter Hill from the Museum of Ideas.


MM: Iım going to write a letter from the museum of Rumour.


MM: Rumerologists says that there have beena variety of rumours about why they got rid of New Media (a) because they wanted to get rid of the CCD board and needed to have a

cover. (b) G-ski didnıt get his money from central government so he decided to restructure.

C) The pope was in the process of applying for the New Media grant and un foreseen ultra-

dimensional circumstances terminated it. (d) Payback for woomera CD interactive


BI: I have to go Israel who will set up the A-Fair show?


MR: says she will go and do the sound and sight check, MM: says she can help too.(NH:

doesnıt offer)


Legal counsel enters the room at 22:00


BI: How can we set up a share structure in ICOLS?


DR: How are you going to attract lost souls?


No one replies...


Some discussion about employee share plans ­ go the free options- directors will get shares

and all the cult members may as well. 


MM: We donıt have saints yet?


All agreed the new subsidiary company name should be COM_CORP.


Meeting adjourned at 22:12

Melinda Rackham

Nigel Helyer

news events page